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Have you noticed when you ask, “How are you doing?,” people often reply, “Busy. Crazy busy.”
Busy has become a badge of honor, and it’s not sustainable.
At work, the busyness trap has us constantly striving to keep an untenable pace. At home, it leaves our children dizzy from the frantic clip and leaves us depleted, resentful, and disconnected from loved ones. Our society does not implicitly value caregiving, but it does value being busy, so as parents, we cram our days full of activities to show that we, too, deserve credit for a job well done.
Here’s the real issue: We’re all caving into this broader narrative without realizing we create the narrative.
Breaking Up with Busyness:
“Look, busyness, we’ve had a good run. Thank you for getting me all those gold stars. I won’t lie, I’ve enjoyed the high from the adrenaline and cortisol I get when we’re together. But it’s taking a toll. I thought if I was with you, I would matter and belong. But I’m tired of running on fumes. It’s time to move on. We need to see other people. I’m going to start dating both rest and renewal. If that goes well, I might take things to the next level and start to see nourishment, leisure, and pleasure too.”
Busyness as a Decoy.
What if busyness is an excuse to mask painful truths and circumvent the scary work of creating change in your life? What if busyness is a form of denial, a pretense, a sneaky avoidance that pretends to do important things on the surface, while neglecting the most important work of all – the evolution of your soul?
The busier you are, the harder it becomes to pause and check-in with yourself and ask, “How am I really doing at this moment?”
As you break up with busyness, you may feel anxiety or panic well up. You may have to face some difficult truths. You might feel lonely, sad, depressed, restless, or scared. That’s normal.
Simply breathe through it, notice the sensations in your physical body, and allow yourself five or ten minutes of quiet time to do nothing. I’m offering you a compassionate hug and an energetic high five every time you do this.
Quick Embodiment Exercise
Read these two sentences, and notice how you feel in your body after each one;
“I am busy.”
(check in with your body, how do you feel?)
“I am relaxed.”
(check in with your body, how do you feel?)
Just reading the words, “I am busy,” I can feel my whole body begin to tighten, and my mind starts to spin.
As I read, “I am relaxed,” I automatically took a deep breath and felt my body start to soften. My mind is quiet.
The words we tell ourselves about ourselves matter. The words we use to describe ourselves to others matter. Mind your language and your reality will follow.
One very simple yet effective action you can take immediately is to stop saying, “I am busy.”
Whatever you put after the words, “I am,” is an affirmation that will become a self-fulfilling prophecy over time. Saying, “I’m busy” will keep you running in circles instead of finding your path.
The Soul Solution Move:
Instead say to yourself;
“I have plenty of time for everything I want and need to do today.”
“I am enough, just as I am.”
“I am exactly where I need to be.”
Try it out for yourself and notice how you feel. Leave a comment BELOW and let me know – what helps you get out of the busy trap?! Was this post useful to you?
May you have plenty of time for everything you want and need to do today, and everyday,
Vanessa